Tuesday, December 10, 2013

I Give Up

Volcano God

I give up. I'm not going to do another god damn thing to try to get people to believe that Yahweh was a volcano god or that that means the Jews, Christians and Muslims are worshipping sod all. Hardly anyone's interested in hearing about this idea and those who are are too afraid to speak out against the baying mob.

So, that's it. I've spent five years researching this damn thing and gotten nowhere other than Ridicule Central. I've put up with panicked Christians, wounded Chosen Ones and threatening Muslims. More than that, I've put up with Rottweiler atheists who would lock their jaws on your jugular if they could for suggesting a new idea. Hell hath no fury like an atheist challenged with new information!

'What? New? Bang!!!'

Stuff world peace. Let the Israeli Jews kill all the Muslims who haven't killed them already and let's hope they blow Jerusalem off the map so it no longer causes any histrionic grief. More trouble than it was worth anyway, damn stupid ramshackle pile of sand blocks, wailing women and weirdos.

Stuff women's lib. Who gives a damn about the future of our girls growing up in increasingly Muslim Europe and other increasingly hell-holish dumps when there are much more important things to think about, like Kim Kardashian's bottom? Besides, headscarves can be pretty, in a prudish kind of way, and they protect the hair from the sun, not that there is any in England. Burkas will mean our girls won't have to spend so long choosing an outfit in the morning. Husbands are generally lousy anyway so the girls may as well let someone else pick one for them. Clitorises are a major distraction so best removed. Being allowed to go outside alone is not such a luxury when you have bags of food shopping to carry for the huge broods so future women will be very grateful for their permanent male shadows. Our future generations of girls will get along just fine with Islam or fundamentalist Christianity, depending on which continent they live in and which century....two thousand years ago or 610AD.

Terrorism. The world needs more terrorism and not less. The place is riddled with us ant-like creatures and the world's resources are running out as fast as the climate is warming up. We need big bombs and big casualty numbers to reduce the numbers of useless eaters.

Parties are over-rated as is humour. I'm not laughing now and I'm ok. Alcohol will soon be forgotten and replaced with black coffee and think of the money saved in accident and emergency. Dancing on tables or wearing short skirts has never done anyone any good so it's going to be a good thing when these tacky acts are banned. Fun? Over-rated. Memorising scripture? Under-rated. Things are gunna change around here.

Stuff soft justice! Heads need to roll! I for one will look forward to seeing some choppy choppy action. It's been a god damn torment seeing petty criminals get away intact. An eye for an eye or a hand for a bread loaf....they deserve what they get (lose).

So the world will forever be imprisoned by a fake religion based on volcano worship, most likely Islam seeing as it's the most smashy smashy. Well, I'll be dead by then so it won't bother me and, besides, the word is full of fakes anyway so it might as well be ruled by something fake. I'll die a happy death knowing the best system for the people will be forced upon them. It will bring an end to the millennia long bickering and prattle prattle between the various factions. An end to the circular arguments that could send any sane person round the bend will be a blessing for humankind, even though it will be ended by a fake religion based on a big blunder. If it works it works.....that's what I say.

So, I shall hang up my finger tips and settle into crusading retirement.

Stuff the truth....three cheers to lies, damn lies and god damn lies!!!

They have so much going for them.

This post is a joke. Laugh while you still can.